Dear Carnival of Shame,

Too late for XMASsacre 2008, but at long last I have located at least a couple mp3's of tracks from your celebrated Happy Alcoholidays 7".

I found it somewhere online. Not all the tracks from the EP, tho' happily the tracks I have so long been missing. I don't know if you guys authorized the presentation of those tracks, but dudes, I am so grateful I have finally re-acquired it. The XMASsacre has not been the same since its disappearance from WXYC's library about 4 years ago.

Hopefully you guys will be pleased as this holiday release resumes its esteemed role in all XMASsacres future.

RESPECT!

Richard

Preliminary Damage Report 2008 XMASsacre

2008's XMASsacre had a stalwart onset, with WXYC's electronic flowsheet fully functional, performing without so much as a hiccup or twitch from beginning to end, save those arising from inevitable operator error. (Spectators and participants of last year's massacre may recall the flowsheet failed during the first hour of desecration, and was not recovered until well after the damage had been committed, foiling all who had wanted to follow the blow-by-blow hits as they happened.) Hail the electronic flowsheet that flows!

Despite lessons learned from last year's holiday havoc, it appears Richard made a last minute decision to extend the massacre an additional half hour, for better or for worse... updates on that, as incoming observations are collected.

Voting for All-Time Favorite Holiday Tune was especially popular this year. As this preliminary report is published, voting was apparently more wildly diverse in 2008 than shown in any extant records of all previous XMASsacres. Many, many single votes were cast; at 8:30 the leaders were in a three-way tie with 2 votes each. Vince Guaraldi's "Linus and Lucy" won by two votes (a total of 4 votes cast) that came in during the mandatory 10-minute sudden-death overtime.

There were--what has turned out to be--a few missing albums from our library that had been there for massacres previous. Having all but given up on the return of the Carnival of Shame's "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" from their Happy Alcoholidays 7", which has been missing since at least 2005, Richard is shocked and still in denial that Bing Crosby's "Merry Christmas" album has vanished, as has a particular Muppets album. The search is on-going for these two lost (misplaced?) vinyl LPs. Final results pending.

A more poignant exposition of XMASsacre VI will be posted in the coming days. Until then, however, we have the most incriminating evidence recorded in the setlist, linked below, from which you may draw your own conclusions:

2008 XMASSACRE VI

If I don't see or talk to ya before, hope everyone has a very, very, very, very, very, very, very happy/grim, warm/frostbitten Solchrismachannakwanyaksmasuhzaastice!

Sweet XMASsacre!

Yes, Virginia, even cookies are part of the XMASsacre dominion:






(Click here for even more beautiful, scary xmas cookies like the one directly above, complete with recipe and directions!)

Colonel Sanders Prepares For Xmassacre In His Own Special Way!

If man is five, then the devil is six...

...that is to say:  

XMASsacre VI
   is on!   

...as always on the last day of exams at UNC...
Friday, December 12, 2008

...at the same time as last year...
3:30 - 11:30PM

...at UNC's student-run radio station...
WXYC Chapel Hill
89.3FM
www.wxyc.org

Be there!

 

 

 

Final Assessment: 2007 XMASsacre

'Twas a consummate 8-hour sleighing December 14, 2007!














However...



Despite this (self-congratulatory) verdict of success,

and in spite of 2008's grim and frostbitten economic climate,

the capitalists--who created the need for the X-massacre in the first place by promulgating the tenet that love and friendship are best determined via a function of "amount of merchandise purchased to be presented as gifts on December 25" and objectifying our winter celebrations to a mean, base exercise in gross commercialism for their corporate ambition--the capitalists *still* seem to be breeding like the vermin they are.

(...or should I say *Stihl*?...)

I think you all know what this means.

It's time for a bit of aggressive

Merrrrrrrrrrrrry Maintenance!

Ho! Ho! Ho!

You got it, Rudolph!

It's time to liquidate the 2008 assets.

Firmly grasp the front handle, pull out the starter grip, and let 'er rip...

A commission to enact XMASsacre VI has been prescribed, so we're breaking out all our best sonic weaponry to do it once again.

WXYC's XMASsacre VI

...because the "Sonic Devestator" is for amateurs...

Friday, December 12, 2008

3:30 - 11:30
89.3 FM
www.wxyc.org